The whole premise of this blog and my future book (assuming a publisher buys it) is the idea that I was completely unprepared for having kids. One of the things I had never thought about was “mommy guilt.”
Mommy guilt is an all consuming force that you can’t shake off or remove from yourself nor can you stuff it down with ice cream or Doritos. Once the baby exits the womb, mommy guilt rears its ugly head and perches upon your shoulder for eternity. My first moment of mommy guilt was when I had to ask Luke to change Lillian’s diaper in the hospital because I was a bit too sore to get out of bed. “I’m her mom. I should be doing this,” I thought as Luke changed her.
And so it begins. Continue reading
Many of you were wanting my take on camping with little kids. I’ll begin by saying that this will not be a super positive review of the experience.
I don’t think I like camping. I think I like the idea of camping. Of waking up to a chilly morning, quietly drinking my coffee by a campfire while listening to the sounds of the world waking up. A bird chirps. A squirrel whizzes by. Ah, camping. The day progresses in a slow, sedated lull. I wander with my campmates through a hike or down the coastline for a relaxing walk. In the evenings, we all don an extra layer and drink hot chocolate with Bailey’s around the campfire until it’s time to curl up in our sleeping bag and quickly drift off to sleep, the fresh air doling out to us the best night’s sleep we’ve ever had.
That didn’t happen though. Even without kids it wouldn’t have happened. Camp coffee always has grounds in it. I’m freezing cold from about 5pm until 3pm the next day regardless of how many layers I wear. I didn’t have any Bailey’s. I also didn’t have my fan who’s sole purpose is to offer white noise so falling asleep to the sound of… well, nature, didn’t really work for me.
Oh, right. And then there’s the kids. Continue reading
We can all agree that kids make some poor choices. They eat crayons, consider the bookshelf their personal Everest, and would rather sit in the toy box instead of, you know, play with their toys.
I think there are a number of ways that kids get it right though. Here’s just a few.
All they want to eat is junk food. Well duh! Who doesn’t want a diet comprised solely of goldfish crackers, fruit snacks, cookies, and juice all day, every day? Screw broccoli; bring on the bacon cheeseburgers!
They don’t want to wear pants. Or any clothes for that matter. One thing I can count on happening every day is my kids whining and moaning when I insist on getting them dressed. They fight. They squirm. Their limbs turn to jello. It’s just a shirt, guys! It’s not the apocalypse. But on those hot days (okay, 80 degrees) when they can run around in just a diaper, I can’t say I’m not a little envious. Continue reading
I think the topic of babies and sleeping has always been, and will always be, one of the most talked about subjects in parenting. You know why? Because there’s no one way to get kids to sleep. That’s why there are eleven million books on the subject. No one knows what works. No one.
We did the cry it out method with both of our children. Well, I tried to do it with Lillian. When we were going through this with her, we lived in a one-bedroom so most of the time she’d either wind up in bed with us or I’d wind up on the couch. I was pregnant with Levi and had to be awake for work at 4 a.m. and I was sleeping on the couch. Does it make sense why this didn’t really work for us?
Now Levi… Levi kind of got hosed. Being the second child, I wasn’t nearly as sympathetic to him and his cries. If I knew for a fact he was clean, warm, topped off, and tired, I would lay him in his bed and let him cry all he wanted. Luckily for both of us, he caught on pretty quick and falls asleep on his own pretty well. Up until a couple weeks ago he was still waking up to nurse at night which I could deal with. I just needed him to be able to put himself to sleep. A 3am feeding is totally okay if it means I’m not sleeping on the couch while 112 weeks pregnant.
For us, sleep training worked. It helped teach Levi to fall asleep on his own. It taught him to self-soothe. I also think it helped him sleep longer stretches at night. It was great.
But here’s what no one told me. Continue reading
Some days it’s hard to decide which I hate more: Lillian hitting me or Lillian ignoring me.
The hitting doesn’t happen too often, and most of the time it occurs at night when she’s just over tired and needs to go to sleep. It’s like her saying, “Mom, I’m going to hit you in the face, but it’s just me asking if I can go to bed early.” Kinda cute, right?
The ignoring thing, though, that drives me up a wall. It’s her silent tantrum. Rather than just throw a fit, she pretends not to hear me.
“Lillian, can you come here please?”
She continues to play with her toys.
“Lillian, come here.”
Play play play.
“Lillian Mary! Come here now!”
Play… play… Continue reading